Touchstone Home
Questions? I have answers...
1. Can you perform weddings?
Certainly! I have been endorsed as a Humanist Celebrant by the American Humanist Associaion, and I am licensed by the State of Ohio to solemnize weddings in our state.
If you would like me to help you celebrate your marriage in another state, please let me know and I can make arrangements, it just takes a little advance planning.
2. What does the law say we have to have at our wedding?
The law states that you must have a registered marriage celebrant (that's me!) to perform the ceremony and sign your marriage licence papers. The minimum words required are very simple vows. I am then required to pronounce you as husband and wife. But of course, we will put together something much better than that!
We hope and trust that soon the Supreme Court will decide that couples of all types may be married in the State of Ohio, and all states, in which case I would be my pleasure and privilege to help you celebrate your marriage.
3. How much input can we have in the form of the service?
As much as you want! A ceremony which evolves from lots of talking and planning will reflect the type of relationship you have and intend to build on in the years ahead. You may write your own service from scratch if you want. You can choose any venue and be married at any time of the day (or night). You could choose to be married on the Lake Erie beach, in a garden or one of the fine settings on the Oberlin College campus, to name a few. People often have children they would like to include in the service. You can choose to include some religious content if you wish or leave the ceremony totally secular- it's up to both of you!
4, Can you give us some ideas?
At our first meeting, I will give you a handout with some suggested services, vows, readings, etc. You can work from there, or you may certainly combine these ideas with your own. I will also give you a working copy (with space for your ideas) and a suggested service to start noting some of your ideas.
5. Can we change our plans?
I will meet with you (usually at least twice) before the ceremony and can be contacted by phone or email at any time. I put each individual service onto my computer but like to print out the service the day before, so changes can be made up to that time. Any changes of date and time should be checked with me as soon as possible to avoid a scheduling conflict.
6. Who is responsible for the marriage licence?
As a couple you need to do this at your local court office, in person. Check for their hours and locations, each county is different. Please bring the licence to me just before the wedding (the rehearsal is fine) and I will fill in the details ready for signing on the day. On the day, you receive a copy and I send a copy back to your local court office.
Funerals
1. Why have funeral service?
You will find the process of choosing a fitting tribute to the loss of your loved one an integral part of the grieving process. Friends and family greatly appreciate the opportunity to say farewell.
2. Can we choose what we want in the service?
Most definitely. We like to think of the service as a celebration of a life. The memorial service is an opportunity to remember highlights of a life well-lived; to use familiar songs and readings; to talk about the person in the most appropriate way for the family.
3. Do we have to use a church or chapel?
Most people find it easier to use the services of the funeral home or church, but it might be appropriate to hold the service near a much loved lake or river or even at home.
4. Can plans be made for a funeral service in advance?
Yes. You may contact me and your Funeral Director to make your wishes known. These can be recorded and kept with both the Celebrant and the Funeral Director.
Naming Ceremony
1. Why have a naming ceremony?
Traditionally, many families held christening or baptisms for their children, even if they were not regular church-going people. Often the church held significance in their community or their lives (they perhaps were married in that church). However, today many parents do not feel comfortable using a church for this purpose, so the naming ceremony grew from that - it is designed to welcome the child into the family, your circle of friends and the world in general!
2. When is a good time to have a naming ceremony?
Some like to have it coincide with the first birthday, but really, any time is OK. It might be when family are visiting or at a reunion gathering.
3. How much input can we have to the form of the service?
As much as you want! A ceremony which evolves from lots of talking and planning will reflect the type of family you have and intend to build on in the years ahead. You may write your own service from scratch if you want. It may still have some religious content if you wish.
4. What about a venue?
Many people like to use their own home or garden. Perhaps some other place holds significance for you—the only consideration is weather! Often with a public venue, it pays to inform the local authority of your plans - it would be akward to turn up and find a wedding in progress.
5. Can you give us some ideas?
Yes - I have a standard naming ceremony (with choices of readings) which can involve family members reading poems, guardians or supporters, grandparents, family and friends pledging to support the child in the years ahead. I can suggest some symbolism which you might like, such as planting a tree, releasing balloons, having a naming cake. We will go through this at our meeting.
6. Can we change our plans?
I can be contacted by phone or email at any time. I put each individual naming ceremony onto my computer but like to print out the ceremony the day before, so changes can be made up to that time. Any changes to date and time, should be checked with me as soon as possible.
7. What will we have to show the child when he/she grows up?
I will give you a copy of the ceremony and a signed naming certificate. Many people like to video the ceremony as well.
